Are you inclined to run from God because there is shame in your life? This isn't a psychological problem–it is a real problem, because it means that there is sin from which you haven't repented. Repentance and confession are not the same. You can confess a sin and then go right back to it. But to repent of sin means to renounce it and make restitution. If you've not repented, none of the knowledge you acquire about Jesus will bring you into his presence. Instead, it will store up wrath as you flatter and deceive yourself about your real spiritual condition. Are you walking clean with Jesus, in his presence, right now? If not, will you immediately renounce all sin and make restitution?